It had thrills. It had spills. It had many other things that are exciting. And the 2011/12 season (that’s the one what just ended, for those of you who were unsure) had some rather fantastic games involving Arsenal, some with more favourable results than others.
I’m not one to dwell on defeats, so this list will only contain victories. As it should really. The defeat to Swansea may have been nice for the neutrals, but I don’t think it qualifies as a vintage Arsenal performance.
Here we go then:
5: Arsenal 7-1 Blackburn
The day it all went so right. After a run of one point from four games, Arsenal appeared to have hit the wall in January after slowly forcing their way back into Champions League contention. Many fans feared the worst having lost 4-3 to struggling Blackburn early in the season. There were even rumours of a fan protest.
Hahahahahah.
Arsenal turned up with a point to prove and, to put it mildly, absolutely ripped into Blackburn. A goal after 90 seconds from Van Persie was followed by a Blackburn equaliser, which was then followed by another for Van Persie and a goal from Alex-Oxlade Chamberlain.
The real carnage started in the second half, but this should be best remembered as the newly-called-up youngster’s breakout performance. He scored twice that day, and made mincemeat out of Blackburn, showing a directness of play that hasn’t been seen in an Arsenal player since Thierry Henry. Not only did it show his individual quality, it also showed that Arsenal were far from dead.
Wasn’t bad for the old goal difference either.
4: Chelsea 3-5 Arsenal
Just as the Blackburn game proved Arsenal weren’t dead halfway through the season, this showed Arsenal were still alive at the start of it. Arriving a few points behind Chelsea, at a time before the cracks in the AVB regime had started to show, nobody really expected Arsenal to get much. And in the first half they didn’t. Chelsea dominated and went in 2-1 ahead at the break. Arsenal proceeded to win the second half 4-1, with Robin Van Persie (again) netting a hat-trick. It wasn’t a vintage performance really, but it was a delightful win against London rivals, and also one where Arsenal took their chances as they were offered to them.
3: Arsenal 1-0 Manchester City
The second edition of the now bi-annual You Stole Our Players You Bastards Derby, ended in a victory for Arsenal. Manchester City had been rocking, while Arsenal had lost at QPR the week before. All of this was forgotten when the image of Samir Nasri appeared in Arsenal fans and players heads. The smug, mercenary Frenchmen was invisible, as were his team as Arsenal dominated the match, ultimately winning it through a late goal from Mikel Arteta. If someone with no idea of the background had watched the game, they would have thought Arsenal were the title-chasers, such was their dominance. As “Nasri, Nasri, what’s the score?” rang out through the Emirates, it was a day to remember.
2: Arsenal 3-0 AC Milan
The Emirates saw something glorious in the first half of this match. An Arsenal with no restraints, no limits, nothing. A feast of attacking, domineering football pummelled Milan into submission, making the 4-0 hiding of the first leg seem a distant memory. The stadium, so often criticised for its lack of atmosphere, was like a 15th man, such was the support. Ultimately, the Gunners had something to play for in the second half and couldn’t quite find that last goal. But the way the Italian champions were taken apart was something to savour, and sometimes glorious failure is the greatest of all.
Well, not really, but it sounds nice.
And at number one, Arsenal 3-1 Stoke City! No, not really.
1: Arsenal 5-2 Tottenham Hotspur F.C, Purveyors of fine choking since whenever the hell they emerged from their fetid slime pit.
The greatest Spurs team in 50 years, title-chasers and the new kings of London. The worst Arsenal team in 15 years, in rapid decline, fresh from leaving the FA Cup at Sunderland a week before. Spurs were 10 points ahead, and looking for a victory at Arsenal. Spurs fans chanted ‘Mind the gap’ and insisted that the balance of power in North London had shifted.
Had it f*ck.
There were 39 minutes where Spurs fans were in heaven. A defensive howler after 5 minutes put them in front, followed by 25 minutes of Arsenal pressure, with no real result. Then Gareth Bale performed a fabulous dive to win a penalty, which ex-Arsenal striker Emmanuel Adebayor, a man with neither talent or integrity, converted to make it 2. Impossible for Arsenal, surely? For another five minutes or so, everything that had been said about Spurs this season seemed absolutely true. Arsenal grew more frustrated at being caught on the break, and couldn’t break through.
Then Bacary Sagna decided he’d had enough of this nonsense.
A thumping header into the bottom corner from the right-back gave Arsenal hope. Then a Van Persie special put them level. The Emirates was ecstatic. Half-time seemed like a shame. It was ruining Arsenal’s momentum.
Oh wait, no it wasn’t!
After five minutes, Tomas Rosicky popped up at the near post to score his first league goal in two years. The image of his face, contorted with joy at scoring against the enemy remains the defining moment of the game, and perhaps the second half of Arsenal’s season. Theo Walcott popped up with two quickfire finishes soon after, and Spurs were buried. Better still, Scott Parker, the ‘family man’ and ‘tough but fair’ midfielder, was sent off for trying to break Arsenal players legs.
A fine day for all. But then again, it was only Sp*rs.
I hope you agree with my choices. Of course you do. I made them.
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